The hard part is over, you broke the ice and asked her out in the first place. Most people see the first date as just a trial run, or an appetiser. Bearing that in mind, you need to show the best version of yourself and make an effort to impress someone enough that it leaves them wanting to see more of you and guarantee a second date. These essential criteria have been identified by Two’s Company after 9 years of matching and feedback.
Studies have shown that smiling is the most effective way to make a good first impression on people. It makes you appear confident – a trait that is considered attractive by most women- and relaxed. It also makes your date feel comfortable around you. Feeling like someone is happy and enthusiastic to spend time with you is a nice way to start off a new romance. You’re also are generally considered to be most attractive when you’re naturally smiling compared to blank or grumpy expression.
Put your phone away
It’s becoming more of a problem as modern life means that larger portions of our lives are inside our smartphones, and a constant rolling feed of friends and current affairs can be extremely distracting. Phubbing (snubbing someone in favour of your mobile phone) has been closely linked to decreased relationship satisfaction. Have you ever seen a couple at a restaurant and feeling sorry for her because she’s staring into her dessert while he’s lost in his *fire emoji* groupchat? Yeah. Don’t be that couple yourselves.
Show you’re listening to what she has to say by nodding, laughing when she says something funny, and giving some conversation feedback like “mmhmm” “no way” or “I understand.” A recurring complaint we get from women is that they felt that men seem to only want to talk about themselves, and weren’t really listening – just waiting for their turn to speak again. Make sure you’re asking her questions, as well as telling your own stories. Women can be shy with their feelings, and if they feel you weren’t interested in them, they won’t act like they’re interested in you either, even if they were.
Even if you’ve had the worst day/week/month ever, at least try to put it to the back of your mind for the duration of the date. Confiding in your date about your problems too soon can lead to some very awkward moments, and treating her as a therapist isn’t really fair either. If she leaves the date feeling down or disheartened, its less likely that she’ll want to see you again. Instead, create a light atmosphere that will leave her associating your time together with positivity.
In short, when she feels good, she’ll associate your presence with this feeling and will be more likely to want to spend more time around you. This advice was based off the important feedback part of the process from many female clients, and now that you’re armed to nail that second date, go for it!