Here at Two’s Company we strive to keep on top of all the latest dating trends, in order to help you to avoid them. And, just when we thought we had the whole “ghosting” thing figured out, we’ve noted an equally dreadful term that has been added to the vernacular.
Say hello to ‘stashing’.
Let us set the scene: You’ve met a new beau. Things seem to be going very well. You’ve spent a significant amount of time together. You’ve brought them along to social occasions. Your friends were fans. Your family were fans. For the first time in a while, everything seems to be going just finnneeee.
But, wait….you haven’t been introduced to a single person from their life. Not one. In fact, you’re not sure they have even told their friends or family that you exist.
They’ll phone their best friend to talk about their day – but your name is never mentioned. You ask them if they’ve told their family about you, and they dance around the question. You take a photo for social media, and they don’t want to be tagged in it.
If any of that sounds remotely familiar, then we have news for you: you’re being stashed.
For all you “Sex and the City” fans, (it can’t be just us?), stashing won’t seem like a new concept. Carrie Bradshaw, relationship and dating writer, thought she was being ‘stashed’ by Big way back in the very first season of the show. She’d told her friends about him, but his didn’t even seem to know her name. In fact, she soon realised that she’d never actually met any of his friends, and that he didn’t seem to care about meeting hers.
It all came to a head when she bumped into Big and his mother at their Sunday church service – and learned that her boyfriend’s mum knew zero about her. The only true difference here is that Carrie didn’t have a term for the trend that is leaving people’s self worth in tatters.
Our advice? If you think your date is stashing you, call them out on it. Communication is key. And if it seems to continue, take Carrie’s advise, and run far, far away, pronto.